Advice for the Expectant Father: Stay Focused on Her

Nov 19, 2018 | Parenting

Some great advice for expectant fathers is found in Armin A. Brott and Jennifer Ash book entitled, “The Expectant Father” (Facts, Tips and Advice for Dads–to-Be, Second Edition)*:

“Although every pregnant woman will need and appreciate different things, there is a lot more common ground than you might imagine. Basically, she needs three things from you now—and for the rest of the pregnancy—more than ever before: (1) Expressions of affection, admiration, and support (both verbal and physical) for her; (2) Sensitivity to her changing physical condition (hunger, fatigue, muscle pains, and so on); and (3) Expressions of affection and excitement about the baby and your impending parenthood. Your support is absolutely critical. According to psychologist Edward Hagen, it actually has a concrete effect on your partner’s emotional and physical health, as well as on the kind of mother she’ll be after the baby comes.”

Ways to show her you care

From their same Chapter, Brott and Ash offer some practical ideas of how an expectant father can show emotional and physical affection and support. Here are just a few:

  • Offer to give her back rubs and foot massages
  • Bring home roses for no reason at all
  • Vacuum the house—even under the bed—without being asked
  • Give your partner lots of hugs
  • Offer to pick up a pizza on your way home from work
  • Offer to run errands for her
  • Do the laundry before it piles up
  • Tell her you think she’s going to be a great mother
  • If you smoke, stop
  • Tell her she’s beautiful. Then tell her again a few hours later
  • Call her on the phone during the day—just to tell her you love her
  • Take a day off from work and hang around the house with her
  • Listen to her complain and don’t tell her she’s complaining
  • Surprise her with breakfast in bed on a lazy Sunday
  • Say “No” if she asks if she’s acting crazy
  • Smile and nod agreeably when she says, “You have no idea what it’s like to be pregnant”

“The Expectant Father” (Facts, Tips, and Advice for Dads-To-Be, Second Edition)
Armin A. Brott and Jennifer Ash, Abbeville Press, New York, NY 10013, pages 82-84

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